I’m sure that everything in life happens for some reason. these past few weeks I’ve been very busy with some things, applying for an internship, moving to a new apartment, sticking to my studies, my horse, my friends, parties... I wanted to be everywhere at the same time. maybe it was too much. maybe I needed a rest to overthink some things and to recapture my creativity, my open eyes for the little things in life.
maybe this is the reason why this accident had to happen: I fell off of a friend’s horse on wednesday evening (the day before my birthday), and because I wasn’t able to get up, the ambulance took me to the hospital, where they found out that I had an ischial fracture. I had to stay there for four days.
the first two days I spent lying in bed thinking I’m gonna die, was afraid that I can’t keep up my studies and all that application stuff, missing some really cool partys (my own birthday party included) and so on... as I was lying there staring hours and hours at the white ceiling I realized that life was going on without me. that sounds sad, but it also has something positive in it: I don’t need to be at every fucking event. I should concentrate on the things and people that really count. I should calm myself down from time to time, take a deep breath and listen to the stories life is telling. talking to foreigners, hear something about their lives and learn from it. that inspires me. I met a lot of people during my time at the hospital and when I came out, I felt the urgent need of writing some stories down.
there was this handsome emergency doctor with pungent eyes and a cute southern german dialect. he looked so young, although he must have been working very hard in stressful conditions, but it seemed that all this didn’t harm him. he told me, that he had seen such bad riding accidents that I couldn’t even imagine.
or the woman in the bed beside me, that slipped in the bathroom and broke her leg. she was only 63, but seemed to be a lot older because of her weight. she told me that nobody can use her walking frame, but me perhaps if I needed it. her daughter was at odds with her, she didn’t like jelly and she slept better by day than by night. I loved her smile.
or the woman, who came to the room on my second day. she wasn’t much older than my mum and had a concussion caused by a car accident. she wanted to go shopping with her sister, because her oldest son would marry in eight weeks. we watched a soppy german movie together friday night.
or the 17-year-old girl, who came to the room on sunday morning. she had bloodied arms and legs and shivered all over. she told us, that she wanted to climb over a fence into the outdoor pool to take a bath after a night out, but got stuck with her hand and fell off. she couldn’t remember anything more than this. I can still see the anxious eyes of her mother when she came in. the situation escalated into a fight, but in the end they all were glad that nothing worse happened.
and the friendly and very professional nurse. she wasn’t much older than me, but was just about to build a house with her boyfriend. she told us a lot about the dangers of this new drug crystal meth, and that so much user come to the hospital. these people were not themselves and would kill someone to get their substance. she was always afraid when she had to look after one of these when she was alone in the night shift.
so is everyone living his/her life. I’m back in my own life since yesterday, taking things slowly. I wonder what these people are doing right now. and next time a conversation-willing person crosses my way, I’ll stop by and listen. that’s what I learned in the hospital.